It’s The End Of 2015! *Open Thread*

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We have been talking about the importance of humor in dealing with what is going on in the world, with our elected officials, and with our personal struggles. What better way to end 2015 than with humor, am I right?

And since it is also still Christmas (twelve days of it – until the Three Wise Men come to see the Baby Jesus), I have got to share with you some hilariously funny Cats Who Crash Nativity Scenes (h/t family friend). Before launching into the photos, the post had this snippet:

There’s an old Christmas legend involving a tabby cat who Mary and Joseph befriended on the night Jesus was born which may explain why you see tiny figurines of cats in nativity scenes. As the legend goes (or so our cat tells us), Mary was so grateful to the little barn cat for watching over Baby Jesus all night long that she reached down and petted his head. This, the story explains, is why the coloring on the heads of many tabby cats to this day seems to form a letter “M.”

As you’ll see from the following cat nativity scenes, many cats have not only never forgotten the role they played in the first Christmas, but insist on making sure no one else does either. Here you’ll find a collection of funny cat nativity scenes featuring kitties who insist on participating in the party, no matter how small the manger may have shrunk over the years. […] (Click here to read the rest.)

I was literally laughing out loud at some of these. I hope you get a laugh out of them, too:

"And the Three Wise Men Brought Gold, Frankincense, and Purr."

“And the Three Wise Men Brought Gold, Frankincense, and Purr.”

"I Just Wanted to Get A Closer Look at the Baby Jesus."

“I Just Wanted To Get A Closer Look At The Baby Jesus.”

"Seriously, All These Cows and Not One Bowl of Milk Among Them?"

“Seriously, All These Cows and Not One Bowl of Milk Among Them?”

"I Noticed the Scene Was Missing an Angel. You're Welcome."

“I Noticed the Scene Was Missing an Angel. You’re Welcome.”

"Make Sure To Get Me From My Holy Side."

“Make Sure To Get Me From My Holy Side.”

Aren’t those great?? There are way too many good ones to include here, so again, the link to see the rest of the slideshow is HERE.

No year end post would be complete without a look back from the incomparable Dave Barry. KenoshaMarge mentioned this post by Barry in a Comment recently, and it is just too good to not feature. Obviously, I cannot include all twelve months, so again, I urge you to go read the whole thing for yourselves. It will be worth it, and will put a smile on your face if not have you laughing heartily.

And now, a few months in review from Dave Barry:

FEBRUARY

… NBC suspends Nightly News anchor Brian Williams after an investigation reveals inaccuracies in his account of being in a military helicopter under fire in Iraq. “Mr. Williams did not actually come under fire,” states the network. “Also technically he wasn’t in a helicopter in Iraq; it was a Volvo station wagon on the New Jersey Turnpike. But there was a lot of traffic.” A contrite Williams blames the lapse on post-traumatic stress disorder resulting from killing Osama bin Laden.

Abroad, Greece, under intense pressure to meet its debt obligations, gives Germany two of its three remaining goats.

In the War on Terror, the White House, having struck a powerful blow with the James Taylor Tactical Assault Ballad, boldly follows up by — again, this really happened — hosting a three-day “Summit on Countering Violent Extremism,” featuring both workshops AND symposiums.

In weather news, Boston’s public schools are closed because of glaciers…

Barry had mentioned previously the very strong message Sec. Kerry had sent the ISIS terrorists by bringing in James Taylor to sing, “You’ve Got A Friend.” Yeah, that’ll show them…

And you may know that Brian Williams is back on air – at MSNBC, the “news” channel that pushes more propaganda than actual news, a perfect fit for Williams, I reckon.

Back to Barry’s Review:

MAY

… international soccer is rocked by allegations that bribery was involved in awarding the 2022 World Cup to Qatar, a nation with little soccer tradition, as evidenced by the fact that the 12 stadiums it has built for the tournament all feature large decorative fountains in the middle of the playing field.

[…]

Elsewhere in sports, the Kentucky Derby is won by New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, riding tight end Rob Gronkowski. All the actual horses in the race mysteriously collapse at the starting line from what Coach Bill Belichick speculates could be “allergies.” Brady also wins the Indianapolis 500 driving a U.S. Army M1 Abrams battle tank that averages only 30 miles per hour but proves to be extremely difficult for the other vehicles to pass.

Abroad, there is big excitement in England, where Prince William and Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge, produce another royal baby, who, in a sign of the changing times, is christened Princess Brooklyn Dakota. She joins the line of royals destined to spend their lives gamely trying to appear interested in an endless series of building dedications.

Oh, my – can you imagine? Some day, I expect that might just happen.

And finally, this snippet from Dave Barry:

NOVEMBER

… the world reels in shock after horrific terrorist attacks in Paris and Mali. With rumors of new threats coming daily, the U.S. State Department briefly considers unleashing Neil Diamond and Barbra Streisand (code name “Doomsday Duet”) to sing You Don’t Bring Me Flowers but elects instead to issue a Worldwide Travel Alert, warning American citizens to avoid potentially dangerous areas, “especially the Northern and Southern Hemispheres.” The department assures Americans that “there is no need to panic,” stressing that they should “remain in bed paralyzed by butt-puckering fear.”

But November is not just a time for fear: It is also a time, as Thanksgiving ushers in the holiday season, for all Americans, regardless of ethnicity, religion or political views, to be deeply offended. Nobody is more offended than college students, who stage a series of protests over the racism, sexism, fascism, heteronormism and — trigger warning — insensitive Halloween costumes that constitute the festering hellhole of hurtful things that is the modern American college campus and THERE IS NOTHING FUNNY ABOUT IT. […] (Click here to read the rest.)

Pieces like this help to bring some much needed relief from some of the tragic events in our world, fulfilling the premise that “if you don’t laugh, you cry.”

We all know “laughter is the best medicine,” and I hope that the New Year brings you far more laughter than tears.

Happy New Year’s Eve, everyone! This is an Open Thread.

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41 Responses to “It’s The End Of 2015! *Open Thread*”

  1. kenoshamarge Says:

    Here’s some old jokes about Bill Clinton:

    Jay Leno jokes about the Clintons

    “Things aren’t looking good for Hillary. Like a lot of women in Washington, I think she’s just starting to realize she may have slept with Bill Clinton for nothing.”

    “The $10 million Clinton is got for his book beats the old record of $8.5 million paid to the Pope. How do you think this makes the Pope feel? The man dedicates his life to the 10 Commandments, he gets 8.5. Clinton breaks every one of them, he gets 10.”

    “Just like Clinton, the book came with a jacket and no pants.”

    “This kind of seems like bad taste to me. A Giuliani fundraiser is now charging $9.11 … in reference to 9/11. … Isn’t that inappropriate? I mean, isn’t it like a Bill Clinton fundraiser charging $69 a head?”

    “Looks like Barack Obama has won the nomination. Congratulations. And Hillary Clinton is about to drop out. She has not dropped out officially. That means Bill Clinton’s about to hear those three words he’s been dreading: ‘Honey, I’m home!'”

  2. kenoshamarge Says:

    And Branco ends the year as brilliantly as he’s entertained and enlightened us all year long.

  3. helenk3 Says:

    http://www.weaselzippers.us/248258-george-soros-blames-donald-trump-and-ted-cruz-for-islamic-terrorism/

    if this evil old goat is against him, he must be doing something right

    • Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy Says:

      Good grief. How in the world did this man make so much money with such an illogical mind??? The attacks on this country and/or Americans began quite some time ago. But somehow it is the fault of Trump and Cruz? Wow. Just SMH…

      • kenoshamarge Says:

        Soros is a lying POS. So many good die young and this creepy old fart lives on to spew his evil forever.

        • Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy Says:

          You ain’t only kidding, Marge. It is just astonishing. I love how the Dems continue to demonize the Koch Brothers for their donations, conveniently forgetting how many Dems they support or how many great causes they support, while embracing this man. Then again, I guess that is why – their perennial smokescreen…

  4. kenoshamarge Says:

    The Bill Clinton Effect: Why Liberals Treat Women Worse

    News of rampant sexual harassment at a leading progressive public relations firm seems to have surprised some on the Left: How can enlightened liberals, so staunchly committed to women’s equality and progress, allow old-school sexism and abuse of power to persist? How could FitzGibbon Media, which represented MoveOn.org, NARAL Pro-Choice America, and the AFL-CIO, have a CEO sending text messages asking for dirty pictures from female underlings?

    http://acculturated.com/bill-clinton-effect/

    • Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy Says:

      This is such an excellent point, Marge. This was one of the things i started figuring out even before 2008, that despite the claims of being the Party for Women, the DNC didn’t treat women very well. How they treated Palin, and Clinton, because they were women, not because of their policies, made that crystal clear.

      And Bill – I voted for him twice, and now that I think of it, I don’t know how I justified those votes given his serial philandering. I am sure I found a way, though – probably enough that he had a D after his name, and a wife who would one day run for President herself…

      Sigh.

      Thank you for this.

  5. kenoshamarge Says:

    Damn Right Bill Clinton’s Predatory History Is Fair Game

    By Derek Hunter

    There are more than 40 million voters who were not on the rolls the last time Bill Clinton ran for office. As hard as it may be to believe, Bill has not had his name on a ballot for 20 years and hasn’t been a direct factor in a general election race since the American people rejected his vice-president in 2000.

    But he’s back, and he will play a large role in this election because his wife is his party’s likely nominee. That and the fact he’s hitting the campaign trail on her behalf mean his past, ever last nasty bit of it, is fair game.

    http://townhall.com/columnists/derekhunter/2015/12/31/damn-right-bill-clintons-predatory-history-is-fair-game-n2098324/page/full

    One thing I will give Trump is that if he decides to go after Bill Clinton, he will be loud, boorish and incessant. No other candidate would dare the wrath of the Left Stream Media if they tried to tarnish the woman abuser named Clinton and his enabler who went after the women he abused and tried to smear them.

    Trump’s big mouth does come in handy from time to time. One suspects that the time may come when the Left Stream Media will come to regret all the free air time they’ve given him. Can they suddenly stop? Probably not – they seem addicted.

    • Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy Says:

      Hell to the yes, Bill Clinton is fair game. As Carly FIorina said – he was a PRESIDENT, for heaven’s sake, so of course he is. Not just for his policies, but for his character.

      And yeah, Trump can get away with this because people expect him to talk smack, but it wasn’t so long ago he was buddy-buddy with the Clintons, even inviting them to his wedding, for heaven’s sake.

      Excellent point abt the media. I bet they didn’t see THIS coming…

      • Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy Says:

        Btw, Marge – when I started to type a response to you a few minutes ago, I glanced up because a hawk was right at our French doors on the deck. It had grabbed a bird, either out of the air or off the lower railing. Holy smokes! I had to run go get Suzy out of her office so we could investigate. Thank heavens it wasn’t one of the feral cats, but WOW – the hawk’s underbelly right outside the door then off into the trees was something to see!

        • kenoshamarge Says:

          There is a Red-tailed Hawk that “lives” down by the lake that stops by our bird feeders for a snack every now and then. He was sitting on one of them when Lou pulled into the driveway coming back from the grocery store this afternoon.

          He chased it away, as we always do – I realize they need to eat too but not from our little ones! They are magnificent birds and even more so close up. But I just can’t enjoy them knowing one of our little ones could be lunch.

          What’s really cool is that while the yard is empty and silent when the hawk is nearby, the little ones sing and flock to the bird feeders, and the back porch where we also scatter seed, as soon as Lou and I come outside. They know they are “safe” when momma and poppa are present.

          • Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy Says:

            I know we have hawks in our neighborhood (we live on a rural island, btw – lots of wildlife here), but I have NEVER seen one come so close to the house. It pretty much banked right in front of the door and took off. I was sad to see that it got one of the birds. I love watching them and listening to them. Heck, my favorite part of the day is early in the morning when I am outside feeding the birds and they are singing away. Love it!

            ROTFL abt “momma and poppa” out there protecting the babies from the big bad hawk!

  6. kenoshamarge Says:

    Mallard Filmore’s New Years Predictions:

    prediction #1

  7. kenoshamarge Says:

  8. Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy Says:

    This is so cute! I know the raccoons who live on the bank at the marsh here would do this too…

    • kenoshamarge Says:

      Love that raccoon! I also forgot to say how much I enjoy the cats in the Nativity Scenes. It that don’t make ya smile…

      From Snopes: Claim: It takes a greater number of facial muscles to frown than it does to smile.

      Status: Undetermined.

      I “determined” that smiling makes me feel better and that’s good enough for me.

      • Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy Says:

        LOL – isn’t it just adorable?? Those little bandits with their THUMBS – they can get into just abt anything!

        So glad you liked the Cats. I was roaring last night as I went through the slideshow.

        Right there with ya abt the smiling. Better to do it than not, right?

  9. piper Says:

    I know I’m bad and will spend the rest of the evening hiding under the covers. The best to you Amy and all the posters here.

  10. kenoshamarge Says:

    • Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy Says:

      We can only hope people finally wake up!

      • kenoshamarge Says:

        Dear Media: Stop Trying To Teach Christians Theology

        We could multiply articles in the Christians-are-meanies-and-I-know-the-Bible-better-than-they-do genre like St. Peter multiplied the animals after they left Jonah’s Ark. But it wouldn’t change the fact that the Most Holy Synod of Journalists doesn’t have an inerrant track record on religion. For instance, they sometimes need reminders that the resurrection is an actual thing Christians believe happened.

        http://thefederalist.com/2015/12/31/dear-media-stop-trying-to-teach-christians-theology/

        • Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy Says:

          It;s a good piece, Marge, and I am glad you put it up anyway! I have been thinking abt this anyway that the media elites, and many Liberal elites constantly put down Christians – until they want to guilt-trip them. Their lack of grasp of Christian theology does not seem to hinder them one bit, I have noticed…

      • kenoshamarge Says:

        Some will quietly decide that their anger and his boorishness just don’t work well together to put someone in the White House that will work for this country.

        Some people, see Obots, get so invested in a candidate that they throw common sense, as well as common decency out the window in support of their chosen one.

        But I never expected the “Trump” phenomena to last this long so what do I know?

        • Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy Says:

          Sadly, I know you are right. I didn’t expect it with Trump either, but the media has propelled him in so many ways over the others, particularly the constant, incessant air time. If any of the other candidates got a TENTH what he gets, things would be different, I think.

  11. kenoshamarge Says:

    Oops, the post from the Federalist about the media and Christians doesn’t belong there and I have no idea how that happened. And all I had to drink last night was peppermint tea.

  12. kenoshamarge Says:

    Houston ‘Anti-Muslim’ Christmas Day Arson Was Set By Mosque Attendee … Just Like Last Year

    Fitting a predictable pattern, the Houston mosque fire was quickly seized on by Muslim organizations, activists, and other media as an example of a supposed rising atmosphere of “anti-Muslim sentiments”:

    https://pjmedia.com/homeland-security/2016/1/1/houston-anti-muslim-christmas-day-arson-was-set-by-mosque-attendee-just-like-last-year

    Why look for the facts when you can just “report” whatever the hell you “think”, or want to think happened?

    If you can’t get an actual Islamaphobe to set your Mosque on fire then do it yourself and blame them because you know the media won’t bother to search out the truth. Even when it’s shoved in their biased, dishonest, corrupt faces.

  13. kenoshamarge Says:

    I don’t know if you’ve seen this before but I found it amusing.

    Shown below, is an actual letter that was sent to a bank by an 82-year-old woman. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the New York Times.

    Dear Sir:

    I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month. By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it.
    I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my entire pension, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in place for only eight years.

    You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30 by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank.

    My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways. I noticed that whereas I personally answer your telephone calls and letters, — when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, faceless entity which your bank has become.

    From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person.

    My mortgage and loan repayments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank, by check, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate.

    Be aware that it is an OFFENSE under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope.

    Please find attached an Application Contact which I require your chosen employee to complete.

    I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative.

    Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof.

    In due course, at MY convenience, I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me.

    I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service.

    As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

    Let me level the playing field even further.

    When you call me, press buttons as follows:

    IMMEDIATELY AFTER DIALING, PRESS THE STAR (*) BUTTON FOR ENGLISH

    #1. To make an appointment to see me.
    #2. To query a missing payment.
    #3. To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.
    #4. To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping.
    #5. To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.
    #6. To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home.
    #7. To leave a message on my computer, a password to access my computer is required. Password will be communicated to you at a later date to that Authorized Contact mentioned earlier.
    #8. To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7 again
    #9. To make a general complaint or inquiry. The contact will then be put on hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service.
    #10. This is a second reminder to press* for English.

    While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call.

    Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement.

    May I wish you a happy, if ever so slightly less prosperous New Year?

    Your Humble Client

    And remember: Don’t make old people mad. We don’t like being old in the first place, so it doesn’t take much to piss us off.

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